Thursday, February 19, 2009

Grocery Store Mania

Ok, just go with me on this one and you'll get the drift I'm sure.

You walk into the grocery store that is your normal shopping destination. The one (actually two) that I most frequent places me in the produce section when I walk through the main entrance. I wiggle my way around the free-standing tables displaying all the beautiful fruits and vegetables, proceed through the bakery area, peruse the meat section then begin the familiar trail of walking up and down the many rows. When I am finished with the entire process I find myself in the Beauty/Health section at the opposite end of the building. Believing I am done collecting the items on my list and in my little stack of coupons, I purposely review that list to make sure I haven't forgotten something and not realize that until I'm in line or have arrived back home.

So here's my dilemma and aggrevation: Now that I have walked the entire two miles through this establishment the size of a football field, being diligent and efficient as possible, I spy the letters "spag sauce" wedged between "lasag" (my shorthand for lasagne noodles) and "pep pkg" (again my language for a package of pepperoni slices). You see my child has asked me to make my recipe for this favorite dish during the weekend when he will be in town I now have this huge obligatory responisibility, as a mother, to fulfull that request.

Thus my frustration...... I know you can share in this feeling of pure agitation because I am sure this has happened to you as well.....Right?? @#!!? AAGGH !!*?# I have to trudge ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE FRONT OF THE STORE where the tomato sauces, etc, are shelved in order to grab the stupid can of Hunts Spaghetti Sauce (no slam on the product in any way--I heartily recommend you try this if you haven't--tastes like homemade) that I just have to have.

I whip my cart around and dare any unwary customer or employeeto get in my way as I powerwalk my way back down the football field to Aisle #2!!! And when the check-out cashier asks me how I am?? I smile beautifully and with effortless aplomb, respond, "Just fine, thank you. And how about you?". The Stepford Wives would be so proud.