Relief

We all feel sympathy when a friend or family member is experiencing the anxiety of waiting for the results from a medical procedure. The kind of news that could irreversibly change their lives. Each of us has been through that. Some more than once. You pray. Hope. Wish. All are sincere. You include each person this news will touch.

And then when it is yourself or your spouse or your child that is waiting for that information the perspective is personal. Real. The prayers take on a different persona. Less concept, more specific. Less effusive, more desperate. There is no buffer of space or time. And the worst aspect? You can't do a thing. Nothing. All you can do is answer the call when the phone rings.

Our family just lived with and through this situation. The final report was the best type a patient wants to hear. The doctor, in essence, presses the gauge on top of the pressure cooker with the "B-word" letting out the steam. Everyone sighs with relief and renews their vow to take advantage of each day we have here together. Love and laugh. Open their eyes and ears to opportunity. Try new things. Release old grudges. Don't put off until tomorrow those items on your TO-DO list. Start now.

So don't wait. That is the bottom line. Smile. Explore. Absorb. Say "please" and "thank you". Let the Lord know each and every day that you accept His blessings with an open heart.

Gray Skies on Good Friday

The overcast layer of different shades of gray fits my mood on this day. I want it to be dark and gloomy every year on Good Friday. I appreciate how the somber ambiance enriches my personal experience. It's as if History transcends Time and thousands of years later we all can "feel" this day of death. This day that fulfilled the promise. This day of ultimate Triumph.

I wonder what the people who were in the temple thought when the curtain rent in two as Jesus breathed his last. Startled? Scared? Annoyed?

I think of all the people who almost a week ago lined the streets as Jesus entered Jerusalem riding the donkey. Shouting "Hosanna!! Hosanna!! (which means "save us") and waving their palm branches. Where were they today? The man they wanted to conquer the Romans....didn't. The man they wanted to arrive as a king....didn't. Were they going about the daily lives ignoring this teacher who disappointed them? Paying no attention because he hadn't lived up to their expectations? Completely forgetting about him. He wasn't worth their time. Were they now standing along his route to Golgotha throwing stones at his stooped and bloodied body? Calling him names? Spitting on him? Or were they gathered along the way bearing public witness for this savior? Were they crying? Did they believe in all that he stood for? All he had taught?

My heart is full. My soul rejoices at the one act that saved the world for eternity. My mind is awed how the child grew up to follow his father's plan and became the symbol for the purest form of love and grace ever shared with all mankind.

Not "Hosanna".... but "Hallelujah".

Being a Mother at Easter

This subject matter is one that I visit every year as we celebrate life everlasting ensured by the gift of a father and the sacrifice of a son. I cannot imagine nor fathom the depth of overwhelming, heart-wrenching pain Mary endured at witnessing her son hanging on that cross. Her sorrow had to have absolutely consumed her. Here was that young woman who had been visited by an angel who told her she had been chosen by God to bear His son. A joyous, miraculous event! And now thirty-three years later she stood literally under his feet with tears streaming down her face watching his pain as he died before her eyes. Even though she knew who he was. Had listened to him preach. Teach. Had heard what he promised if people committed their lives to his Father.

Yet as she followed him to Calvary while he half-shouldered, half-dragged that massively heavy burden, she herself bore the excruciating weight of every human mother. We have all been overwhelmed at times with wanting to make things better when we see our children suffer. But to be present and have no control? Feeling absolutely helpless? And know that it must happen.

But she did come, didn't she? Came for her child. Her boy. Just as we all are there for her child. As well as our very own.

It's Peeps Time!!

Easter baskets were a big thing with my family when I was growing up. They were hid inside the house every year so no matter if it was snowing, raining or bright and sunny the hunt was on! We each had multiple baskets -- some small, some large. Each was filled with some candy or a small gift and a sprinkling of jelly beans always topped them off.

I have been a chocolate lover since I left the womb yet I must confess that when I spotted those yellow sugar coated marshmallow birds nestled in the green grass every year I was a very happy girl. More like thrilled. I challenged myself to make those confections stre-ee-ee-tch out for as long as I possibly could. That was really, really hard for me. So I would tell myself the wait was worth it. Why? Because the longer the birds sat out uncovered the chewier they got. And, oh, how I paced myself to allow them to reach that perfect moment, you know, when they were just passed that "instantly dissolve on the tongue" stage but before the "hard enough to bounce off the floor" plateau. Like I said. Perfection.

I'm going to the grocery tonight. Hmmmm. It's hard to control that cart sometimes and it can be quite stubborn. Maybe it will make up its mind to take a little stroll down the candy aisle. I wouldn't be surprised if one of those little boxes of 6 connected-at-the-hip gaggle of birdies will take flight and land right inside that rolling basket as it slows down just a little, tiny bit....

The Bathroom Wall

Yesterday afternoon found my mind revisiting a situation that happened to me two years ago. Totally out of the blue this woman burst back into my mind, wrapped up in all the pent-up, frustration of what I DIDN"T say to her then. Boy, I sure wish I had verbally layed her out standing there in that beautiful, tropical hotel lobby when I had THE perfect chance, with me having every right on the planet to be as furious as I was. (Rats. I hate it when I am mature and act like a lady. )

All of a sudden this incredible dialogue eloquently listing all of her indiscretions came flowing out of my mouth. Literally. Out loud. The phrasing, my voice modulation, the subtle use of emotion. Man, I was so smooooooth. Proud of myself? Absolutely. Eloquent? Better than Lincoln. And my audience? Thoroughly appreciative. Awestruck would be an even more descriptive term.

My performance was ever so persuasive with just the right touch of emotion quietly punctuating my masterful presentation.....especially when heard by the best friend a girl could have. The perfect listener and critic. The bathroom wall.

The same confidante that has been there for me through thick and thin, good and bad. Always sympathetic, forever on my side. Never has it betrayed me. Never has it let on to all of the secrets it has heard. Oh, the stories it could repeat, the juicy blackmail material. I am ever so grateful that it cannot.

I Feel So Empowered!

Three days ago I was taught by my child to burn CD's.

1. Talk about feeling "smarter"!
2. Thrilled to be able to quit asking someone else.
3. Can do it whenever I want -- anytime, anyplace.
4. Woo-Hoo!!!
5. Mama is very cool now!
6. Lookout World -- the CD Queen is on the scene!
7. Knowledge is power. And I am loving it!
8. I'm on to the next project on my list.
9. No, I'm not telling you what it is.
10.You be hearing all about it later.
11. You can count on that!

Thanks for putting up with my smugness. And between you and me? It feels really, really good.

Can You Smell It Yet?

On the days that belong to the winter-turning-to-spring cusp, I have a secret passion. I crack open one or two the house windows and, slowly, fill my lungs with the anticpated, treasured promises that are beginning to arrive. Inhaling all of those wonderfully rich fragrances dancing just outside the glass pane, I am renewed.

Like the sweet scent of the quietly unfurling daffodils, curling back their tender green coats to bare the fragile buds within. (breathe deeply...ahhh. Heaven) . Or catch a whiff of newly mown grass as flows through the neighborhood, weaving an invisible path between the cluster of houses. To close my eyes and sense the light breeze as its tendrils slip through the screen to tease my skin. And maybe, just maybe, I catch a tangy hint of a sea breeze swirling in this recipe of richness that nature alone can provide.

To hear the silently whispered message heralding the anticipated change of seasons that has once again begun. To greet with a faint smile these blessings which I embrace gratefully. To find soulful pleasure in gifts so freely given. To me? That is the core essence of luxury. The true definition of priceless.