Guardian Angels

I pictured for years, when my husband traveled for business, an angel with a flaming sword sitting on our roof every night. Protecting. Keeping away evil. Battling any bad guys. I could sleep at night with a heavenly partner in my corner. Especially after our child was born.

When my son entered high school the intensity of the social culture kicked up a notch. Not so much the popularity pressure but other influences like alcohol. Drugs. Smoking. Sex. As a parent vigilance took on an intense new meaning. I asked for the Holy Spirit to protect my son. To re-enforce good decisions, right choices. Two names and faces appeared in my mind' eye: 'Frank' with glasses, short dishwater blond hair, thin, kind of geeky. 'Joe' -- darker/longer hair, brown eyes, very cool dude. (Guess our kid needed extra attention!)

During the college years I found myself praying even harder, relying on them all the more. All this sound weird? To you, maybe. To me? Absolute relief. Four years flew by. No calls from jail or the hospital.

We could look at this from a practical viewpoint. Strictly as an employment issue. Think of all the good souls now living in God's house. Their loyalty, faith, focus to duty are unquestionable making them excellent prospects for the millions of positions available. It's the perfect situation. Their talents partnered with the desperate need here on earth. Talk about a win-win.

So -- we're down to brass tacks. Do GA's exist? I haven't seen any. Nor talked to one. No correspondence has ever been exchanged. No fingerprints, footprints, etc etc. (... or wing-prints in this case) have been found in or around my house. No physical evidence. But that's what makes it feel so good. My faith alone unequivocally tells me they are here.

And that's all the proof I need.

Lutein, My New BFF

Last year's eye exam revealed the slight possibility of my developing Macular Degeneration. Scared the bejeebies out of me. Even the mere thought of living only with peripheral vision rocked my world. My optomitrist recommended spinach, blueberries and brewed tea all of which hold healthy natual suppliments for eyesight.

Those three components instantaneously became constant residents with reserved shelf space in our refrigerator. Each are eaten everyday without fail. (The thought of me eating spinach AT ALL is crazy enough -- my we--known hatred of this cooked vegetable has been replaced with a fantastic respect for its fresh form!!)

Fast forward to this year's annual visit. 1) Photographs showed NO CHANGE!!! 2) Suggestion made for eye vitamins -- containing Lutein. Eye vitamins?? What do you mean 'eye vitamins'?? Went straight to the nearest CVS. Read every label on every available brand (the employee stocking the shelves asked me twice if I needed help!). Chose one with 20mg. *Lutein is found in the macula. Deeper concentration of pigment is optimum for good eye health. Some studies also show a correlation between higher levels of this vitamin with lower risk for cataracts.

Some days I swear I'm turning blue. Or green. But considering the alternative --I don't care what color I am!

Intimidating Cook Top

Yep. I was bullied by the new, shiny, black Kenmore Elite recently installed in our kitchen.

I feel like all of you are members of my support group, currently sitting in metal fold-up chairs arranged in a circle. Ready to say, "Hi, Julie!" when I stand to introduce myself and clap when I publicly state my problem: I am scared of my cook top.

Doomed to fail from the start after reading the direction manual. DO NOT USE ANY PAN THAT DOES NOT FIT PROPERLY IN ONE OF THE CIRCLES ON YOUR COOK TOP. ALL POTS AND PANS MUST SIT ABSOLUTELY FLUSH ON THE SURFACE. MAKE SURE THE HANDLES ARE PROPERLY POSITIONED. CLEANING IS ESSENTIAL AFTER EACH USE. DO NOT DROP ANYTHING ON TO THE SURFACE AS MULTIPLE BREAKS MAY OCCUR."

I felt as if I had been lectured, rather loudly, and promptly smacked on the knuckles with a ruler by the time I had finished the last page.

Took me three days to finally boil a pot of water for my tea.

A Fractured-Kind-Of-Day

Ever have that kind? Where you feel pulled one way then another AND, on top of those, a third? You have all these 'things' you want to get done and just wish you had the time RIGHT NOW to do them once and for all? (the spectres of extreme agitation and overwhelming frustration hover very near....)

My list includes things like weeding out my recipe shelf; going thru the TALL stack of brochures we collected in JANUARY at a vacation and travel show; check out the intriguing websites I've torn out of magazines/hastily scribbled down; write more chapters for my books; actually finish a manuscript and work to get it published; call friends I need to catch up with; spend more quality time with my husband; and my family; clean out my files in the file cabinet. (You get the picture, I know, because you have one, too, don't ya?)

Part of my problem is I need to simply let go of 1/3 of them. They are not as important as I brainwash myself to believe they are. Done. Check

This evening I spent an hour and a half waiting for my car to be serviced. I took some work from my job that I have been carrying back and forth between my desk and home for over a week and got it done. A WEEK. What is my problem?? All finished. Check.

So. My mid-year resolution is to scratch off the unnecessary, the superfluous, the waste-of-timers. Focus my energy on getting a few done well. My hand is now reaching for the ON button of the CD player -- a little relaxation music, please, while I start making a MUCH shorter, fresh list of high priorities. And the first item at the very top of the list? "NO MORE LISTS!!!!!"

Finding YOUR 'Paris'

Yesterday my husband and I saw Midnight in Paris. This is the story of a man valiantly trying to swim against the tide of his everyday existence, a place of personal discontment where his life and choices have led him. Yet there is an innate yearning residing just under his skin which burns in his soul. His whole being comes ALIVE in Paris and he realizes that he has found the city of his dreams. His restless spirit has found its home.

We all seek that specific 'something' that burns perpetually in our own core. Causes stomachs to flutter with anticipation and need. Mine is to write, to share the stories thriving between my ears which no one else can 'hear' right now. I would love to be published --sooner than later if I had my wish! It's the invisible drive that lurks right below my surface. Finding the time not allotted for other responsibilities, duties and drudgeries, where guilt can't sink its talons into me, is what propels me on many a day. I live with a mixture of unadulterated happiness when I do write and anxious desperation when I don't. The imbalance is distracting.....yet challenging.

Thus I have become quite resourceful in hoarding clusters of minutes where I can open my laptop or notebook to extract the conversations and drama, humor and emotions bubbling in my mind -- much like Dumbledore pulling out his thoughts and preserving each in his pensieve.

When my opportunity arrives, I hope all of you are with me to enjoy the ride! And my wish for all of you? Recognize, grasp, follow the path where your heart leads. Be tenacious. BE BOLD. Allow the embers to become a blaze and find your fulfillment. Perhaps Paris will be your destination as well.....

Wickedly Fixated on Eugenia and Beatrice

Oh, my. Still shaking my head. In a matter of seconds these two young women became the laughingstock of this elegant, sophistocated wedding and fodder for an unimaginable amount of worldwide ugly, caustic facebook comments. One would hope someone -- like their father or their cousins or their grandmother or their friends or fashion industry stylist or a designer or a woman known for her fashion sense or the upstairs maid for goodness sake-- would have stepped in voicing an honest opinion and told these two "NO, you cannot wear that!! The designer is lying to you!"

Really?? All who attended were MAIN STAGE entertainment for the entire world and you choose to arrive in some blue, puffy poorly fitted costume (from designer Vivienne Westwood) that looks like an off-the-rack reject and next to you stands your sis who's wearing this thing on her forehead?? Staring at her Philip Teasy design, a myriad of comparisons jumped in my brain: an Egyptian queen headpiece a' la Cleopatra; Diana, roman goddess of the hunt with her signature crescent moon coronet; a laurel wreath and ribbon from some limestone war memorial. I know. I know. I am not being nice at all. But I am being honest. ("...a spaghetti O.."/ "...Sesame Street lesson on the letter O"../"...10 pts if you can throw something thru that hoop"../"...Cinderella's ugly stepsisters.." were a few of the comments I read today. Ouch.)

When they got out of the car I believe I heard a collective viewing audience gasp. I'm guessing budget was not a prohibitive factor for these women and one would think that one would want to be in the 'Fashion Icon' column as opposed to the 'Most Disastrous Fashion Faux Pas'. Seriously, I am hoping they fell in love with these get-ups and simply couldn't help themselves. At least that would be an understandable excuse. We've all bought a piece or two in our lives we look back on later with much chagrin.

Closing on a bright note: I did love Beatrice's Valentino-designed coat and shoes. Very tasteful and such a pretty shade. AND did you notice her new figure? She has done some extremely serious, disciplined weight loss and looked fantastic. Sincere kudos to the princess!

Ode to Sanity

took a shower tonight.

turned the pressure up and

let the spray beat on

my back.

stood still while

the hot water ran over my shoulders

then down to my toes

like a fluid, thermal blanket.

best therapy on the planet

this person could choose.

stayed so long

the hot water tank emptied.

really.

that was a first.

some would say i wasted

money.

others, water.

i say both are wrong.

best shower.

ever.