My Favorite Annual Appointment

Every woman who reads this will absolutely identify. Without question it is one of the most important gifts you can give yourself. No matter how you personally feel about this exam, you MUST do this for your own health and piece of mind and that of your family. All that being said.....

I have gone to the same OB/GYN for 21 years. I respect him as a doctor and like him as a person. We get along just great and just talk about anything. Now. Those first few years were a tad bit rough.

I call this the "Scoot down...a little more...Ok, stop. That's good" appointment. My analogy: Me lying on the table being given both audible and visual signals on how and where to place myself is like being an airplane slowly rolling across the tarmac with one of those orange-cone waving airport employees guiding me into a good position for the lock with the loading gate tunnel. Once you are in position the cones are crossed, employee stops walking backward and you're good. Except in my personal scenario I am now lying there feeling like I'm totally uncovered for the entire nation, hearing those seven familiar little words, "It's going to be a little cold."

I don't know about you but the first time I was with my doctor I felt a whole lot embarrassed. Heck, it is like you're screaming, "Hey!! Here I am!! I'm feeling a little vulnerable and very exposed so hurry up about it, will ya?" How did I handle it? The first year I said (total truth here) trying to break the ice a bit , "So, is it dark down there?" He slowly raised his eyes and very quietly, very professionally replied with something like, "This won't take long. Let me complete this test."(when he was actually thinking, "Oh, great. I got a comedienne on the table and I just want to get through this as easily as possible.") The second year I asked, "Does everyone look pretty much the same?" thinking that if I were he I would MUCH rather be delivering babies than conducting Pap tests. This time he obviously felt more at ease with me since I was making another one of my quirky inquiries to lighten the atmosphere. His reply, again very professional and softly spoken, was "Shut up, Julie" and I started to giggle. By the third year we were totally comfortable with each other, conversing like old friends through all of the exam asking about vacations, dogs, kid, spouses. And this year we celebrated my 21st exam together and over the years our dogs have passed on and new ones found to love, careers have changed in my family, child has gone to college, lots of vacations enjoyed. We have laughed together. Cried together.

I still ask occasional questions during the exam just to relive the good old times. He still gives me the look. And, come to think about it, he never did answer my questions.